Saturday, June 16, 2007

akkare akkare akkare !

My friend came from Tuticorin (where he claims he works) to tvm so that he could catch a flight to Dubai today. He lands at 10 in the morning and calls Anilesh and goes on a shopping spree .. ( he has an allowance of 10K for the trip accessories and he plans to get everything. for ppl who know my colg gang . its JT).

excerpts from what transpired during this period of total chaos:

scene 1

J.t barges into the costliest retail store in the city and proclaims : "I don't care how much it costs, but I need the best."

hearing this, the prettiest damsel saleswoman walks over ,smiles demurely and asks " what is it that you intend to buy sir ?"

J.T (unabashedly) : get me 5 underwear !!!!

ps: anilesh looked around and said " I am NOT with him " and walked away.

scene 2

They go into another showroom to get a tie. JT is in a very foul mood because he lost more than half an hour due to uncooperative(!!) staff at the previous place. so he goes into this shop, grabs a tie and says " I will pay the cash now, you can make the bill later .. "

the shop ppl being very honest and truthful (as all Indians are) say that they would not part with the 'tie' unless they have a bill for the transaction ..

JT grumbles "I hate these bloody Indians" and says in a dubai accent " ok ok hurry it up"

While the saleswoman is packing the tie .. JT gets hold of the bill, pays it and starts marching out of the shop .. perplexed and surprised .. the sales lady calls behind him " Sir, don't you need this thing" . She is holding in her hand the tie for which JT had just paid the bill.

JT .. nope , I don't need it .. you can keep it! " and walks out of the showroom triumphantly for having saved some time not picking up the tie (yet paying for it).

Anilesh does the mopping up this time round.

Scene 3

Next they move into a shoe bazaar ( chor bazaar types) and some thug hands him a shoe that he claims is 'woodlands' and is selling it at a discount - now it costs just 2500 .. JT jumps at the bargain and gives him the cash and before he could say " you can give me the bill later", the thug has vanished !!

he somehow finishes his shopping, get home. packs everything he has just bought + the official samples ( this is the reason why he is flying to dubai) and we pack him off to the airport .. we reach there and give him an emotional send off and start on our way back .. halfway back from the airport he calls and asks us to come back to the airport ..

me: why? what happened ?
JT: eda, they are not letting me take those samples with me .. so you guys will have to take it back.

me: then what will you do once you get there ? what will you show your client ?
JT: I have taken fotos, I will show them the snaps of the sample.

Ok ppl .. the sample that he was taking with him was some kind of SOIL .. foto of soil ????

scene 4
emigration check officer (ECO) : sir are you going on business?
JT : (impatiently) yes yes .. (looks at his Rolex watch).

ECO : Sir , could you please show me the license?
JT : huh , what license?

ECO: Sir don't you know .. you need a license to export Underwear from India to Dubai !


I seriously doubt how he would last in Dubai for 5 days . I hope he keeps his hands in his pockets(!) and more importantly doesn't venture out to shop on his own .. ALL THE BEST J.T

nb: special thanks to Anilesh for filling me in on what I missed .. I arrived late(as usual) and missed the shopping part!